Consummating The Marriage

From Mary-Beth’s diary the next ten days of married life carried a similar tone. Each time that her and her husband started to become too intimate, he would reject her and satisfy his own needs himself.

On the eighth day of their marriage, Mary-Beth writes that she was desperate to try anything that she could think of to make him love her, so she decided to attempt to use her mouth on him. He had mentioned this behaviour before, but she could not bring herself to do it previously. At first he seemed quite interested, but then as she was under the covers he went flaccid, fell asleep and began snoring. This certainly did not help her self-worth. She couldn’t help but wonder how he could fall asleep? Even if she did not know what she was doing, she couldn’t figure out why he would fall asleep if she was the only person that he had ever been with. She started to seriously doubt that he was a pure as he claimed to be. She was so hurt that she got out of bed, dressed and walked out the door. Previously, she had always been afraid to leave, because Lorne often brainwashed her into believing his psychotic “monogamous” religious beliefs that she would be going to hell.

She had no idea where she would go. She was in strange city and didn’t know anyone. When she was a couple of blocks away, Lorne caught up with her and asked what was wrong. He seemed so genuine, that Mary-Beth was caught off guard. He had run out after her in his bare feet, and so she thought that he truly cared. (Personally, I think that he was just afraid of losing a slave.) Perhaps because she had no money and no where to go, and was terrified that she was going to go to hell, she talked herself into believing that her husband cared and she returned with him.

On day ten, Mary-Beth was still concerned with not having consummated their marriage, and obviously had an incorrect belief that if they consummated their marriage then their marriage would get better. So she offered to spend all her money (she had a few hundred dollars set aside) on an expensive suite at a five star hotel. This seemed to work, and Lorne quickly agreed. Once there though, Lorne made a demand that if she wanted to have intercourse with him that she would have to perform a particular position. She submitted and did as he asked. It was a painful experience, but at the same time she was so excited that she began to have an orgasm. When the orgasm began, Lorne began to withdraw. She begged him not to, but he forcefully pushed her away, leaving her body contracting, but not with pleasure. (From this point on in her diary, there is a significant change in her writing. Obviously the result of serious neurosis.)

As time went on over the next few months, Lorne seemed to just stop all offers of intimacy and would only allow Mary-Beth intimacy once or twice a month. At first he just liked to watch her, then he would take care of himself. He eventually got to the point where he told her to take care of her own needs as well, though it seems to have progressed to that point over the course of the first year of marriage. She was able to have intercourse though if she was willing to pay him for it, usually by buying him expensive gifts.