Tuesday, September 7, 2010

The Pains of Change

Being raised in a religion with polygamist roots, I was taught that there would be polygamy in heaven, but that it was not allowed here on earth. But in the same breath, I was taught that those that lived the fundamental principles (like polygamy) of my religion were all evil people. I was taught by my leaders that fundamentalists were all cultists who brainwashed their women and traded spouses like baseball cards. I was taught that little girls were constantly molested and that all anyone cared about was sex, but how was this different from how I was raised in my “monogamous” religion? It was quite the irony, but unfortunately, I did not see it and blindly believed my leaders.

Then I met JR and everything changed …

From the first moment I met JR I knew there was something special about him. It’s true I did not believe his line about seeing me in a dream, I had been told that one before, but after talking to him for a few minutes, I did not want it to end. My friends were ready and I had to go, so I asked him for his address and asked if it would be okay if I wrote him a letter. He said sure and gave me his address. Then he did something that completely surprised me, he asked me for my address, he was actually interested in me too; I was thrilled!

JR was different from anyone I had ever met in my life. When he made mistakes, he would confess them and own up to them and try to fix the damage that he had caused. This was completely different than what I had been taught in my “monogamous” church, from my observations, all you had to do was pretend to be sad and maybe stop doing it, or at least stop getting caught. JR’s way seemed a lot better and I started questioning some of the other dubious doctrines taught by my “monogamous” church.

JR and I started dating and discussed the difference between the gospel and the church often, and we were beginning to see that the gospel and what the “monogamous” church leaders taught did not match up. We could see that one of the greatest blessings of the gospel was plural marriage and here was the church telling us that it would be practiced in heaven, but those who practiced it on earth were going to hell. Before we married, JR asked me how many wives I would let him have. Despite all the prejudices taught me by my “monogamous” church, I answered that he could have as many wives as he would like. This was the beginning of my Escape To Polygamy.

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